Confessions from the past week

1) I dislocated my daughter's elbow.

Windy day, holding grocery bags in one hand, C.'s hand in the other. Crossing a busy parking lot and she starts goofing around with her sister, twisting around. She loses footing and starts to fall. I have no hands free so I lift her into the air with the one hand holding mine and set her back on her feet. While she's in the air, I hear a pop-pop-pop. And I just know. She's crying and won't move her arm. The doctor called it "nurse maid's elbow" and it happens to hundreds of toddlers every day in the same way it happened to her. The doctor relocated it and she was instantly better- no pain at all and full range of motion again. But the trauma kept her teary and clinging to me all night. I'm so sorry my love. The guilt pains me.

2) I was all upset about getting a 91% on a test.

Like a total tool. And my lab partner told me she got a C and I said, "oooh, I'm sorry." and she gave me a look and said "no, I'm fine with that." right. I'm a jerk.

3) I acted like texting was no big thing for me so I wouldn't look uncool to a classmate.

I go to the same gym as a classmate and she's at least 10 years younger than me. I suggested that we get together to study before our test next Wed and she said, "cool. I'll text you. Um, your phone has texting, right?" as if I have my grandmother's cell phone. So I was like "totally." and now I have to spend 10 minutes to ping her out a quick text bc that's how she prefers to converse. She must think I'm super busy that I take so long to respond to texts. Really, I have no keyboard and I'm old.

4) I faked sleep so Jeremiah would get up and deal with C. in the middle of the night.

She's crying for me day and night right now. I blame the election and of course my leaving for school two nights per week isn't helping. And I'm very tired right now.

5) I agreed to pay outrageous sums to have someone else clean my house, room by room over the next month.

She's really only doing three rooms, but for that price, you'd expect a lot more. Whatever. I will pay it bc that's how much I don't want to do it. I can't blame her. It's so much work that I'd charge me a lot more!

6) I really wanted to teach my yoga classes at big places but now that I have two opportunities, I'm stalling.

J.'s preschool approached me about teaching classes at the school and I still have that opportunity at the community college to pursue. If I can just stall for 11 more days, I'll have a much better idea of what I can and can't handle next year!

7) I played nice with people that I am not going to vote for, implying that I would.

If you can't say anything nice, you should not say anything at all. Little white lies are stupid and I guess I only do it bc I'm treating them how I would want to be treated. Still, I should just shut up. Lying is bad for the soul.

8) I went to the gym and ran just so I could watch part of a crappy movie and do nothing else.

Gym childcare is a real blessing. Worth every penny for the time alone.

9) I keep doing the easy stuff that's not due until next week but handling the big stuff on the fly bc I never prepared for it.

This applies to: school, work, housework, emails, yoga stuff, and catching up with friends.

10) I am rewarding my daughter for wearing pull ups to bed (calling it "keeping your sheets dry") so that she'll be ok with wearing them.

I don't have time to change the sheets every day anymore so I'm persuading her to skip the underpants and potty and just revert to the pull ups.

Here's hoping that next week is better!