Old School

I've been back to school for a week now and it's a whole nother ball game this time around.

Undergrad at St. Marys was revolutionary for me. It's quite unfair that I'm still subject to my grades from that time because the classroom was definitely not in the foreground of that experience. I was dealing with a lot of stuff, as do we all- being independent, living alone for the first time, meeting new and different people, self-evaluation and personality solidification. Plus lots of trauma- my mom passing away and being hijacked during a study abroad in Guatemala. Then add on that I worked two jobs each semester while in school and had intensive summer jobs in between. My classes came and went. I loved some, hated others, but school was what I was used to as a background to my life. I lived and breathed some of my philosophy, education, and ecology classes. I totally forgot about some of my gen ed classes and the hard parts of my bio classes.

This is a shame because it's those hard parts that I never quite mastered that I'm relearning now.

My Nutrition class and Anatomy and Physiology class are both reviewing the basics of chemistry, cell function, and biological processes. Developmental Psychology is reviewing classic psychological theories. I recognize all of this. But I'm fuzzy on the details. So here we go again!

After St. Marys I went to Audubon Expedition Institute for my masters in environmental education. That's where I truly and completely experienced self-directed learning. Yes, at St. Marys I got credit for several different Independent Practicums that I designed and got approved so I could learn what I wanted, how I wanted. But those were in addition to my focus of study. At AEI, every single day and every single subject was self-directed. The teachers were there to help you challenge yourself. We even self graded. And no, I didn't always give myself A's. Self-directed learning was so empowering and I remember every topic I decided to study because it was an integrated and natural experience.

School this time around feels completely different to me than ever before. It's certainly not self-directed but I am very motivated to do well anyway. Last night I told my lab partner about my school plan and her eyes widened with pity at how much school I still had ahead of me. I know, dude, I know. But now I'm like, do I want to be a midwife who DOESN"T know this? No. So I must learn it. Again.