My friend from college, Kevin Shannon, emailed me with some questions about being the wife of a political candidate who has kids at home too. He's writing a novel and doing some research for one of the minor characters who has that in common with me. So here's his questions and my answers, for posterity's sake.
1) What is the most difficult aspect of being a mother--with young children--while also supporting the political campaigns of your spouse? Time management? My character would not, for example, have had daycare as an option in the 1970s.
The most difficult aspect of being a mother is not having him at home. I know how hard he has to work at other times in order to be able to spend any time with us. It’s hard to hear if people didn’t appreciate his presence bc we’re all sacrificing having him here with us so that he can be there with him. It’s very hard being a wife and feeling your husband go through all this. And he misses the kids some days, which is hard for all of us. Sometimes he doesn’t have time to help me around the house or to support me in my job. So then I’m doing extra work for “the people” too.
2) What aspects of your spouse's political life do you address? Do you plan/schedule fundraising dinners/debates? How do you participate? Do you participate? Is his political campaigning a family affair?
I planned and scheduled his fundraising Gala (I was not the head of the Host Committee, but I still had to be the one to meet with the location and sign over a check, approve the flier and distribute copies of it to the committee for dispersal, and make phone calls and send emails to family and friends encouraging them to attend. Plus all the other roles that we on the committee had, including asking for items for the silent auction.) I also planned and coordinated his float in the Pasadena Parade last November. I rode the segway. J He coordinates a Host Committee for each of his fundraisers and is doing the correspondence about a future debate by himself. He does lots of strategizing meetings and information seeking meetings on his own with people who want to help. I went to Legislative Night with him last night where we met with other politicians and political candidates and watched the legislature in session. He has taken the kids to a few political functions that are made for kids. And we expect to bring the kids to parades and family friendly events in the summer when the campaign is near the end and there’s a lot of stuff going on. But yes, it’s still a family affair bc he is us. What he does, we all do, even if we’re not there.
3) What are the most time-consuming aspects of assisting with a spouse's political career?
By the clock it would definitely be the evening hours and weekend hours that I’m with our children on my own while he attends meetings and political functions and goes door to door and attends fundraisers (yes, for other candidates. I did not realize that this was a big part of it but it is.). I don’t do any evening exercise classes like I used to bc of that. I don’t go out with friends as much and we definitely don’t go out together much. If he’s not at a political function, he’s home relaxing or doing extra law work.
4.) Are there any particular challenges to launching a career in local politics (if your answers are specific to Maryland's local politics, that's actually perfect).
Challenge #1: He’s not a Republican.
We live in Pasadena, which is the largest section of the District that Jeremiah’s running in. All 3 of our current Representatives, and our Senator, are Republican. Republicans have won for a long time now. One of the Representatives, Don Dwyer, is a right-wing conservative Christian who handles politics like it’s a religious quest. His ignorance and bigotry is astounding. And he’s been elected by our District twice! That is one of the reasons why Jeremiah is running. To replace that guy with someone less extreme. So Jeremiah’s running as a Moderate Democrat. If I were running, I would be a liberal but I would not get elected here. Jeremiah and his politics have a better shot. He gets support from Dems, Republicans, Green Party, Libertarians, and Independents.
Challenge #2: He doesn’t belong to a church.
But he’s already been asked what church he goes to and he had to honestly answer that he’s Christian but that he doesn’t attend a church. That did not go over well here. (so much for respecting the separation of church and state!)
Challenge #3: He doesn’t have the same politics as the editor of the local paper.
In Pasadena we have two papers- The Pasadena Voice, and The Gazette, which covers a wider area. The Gazette has published Jeremiah’s letter to the editor, press release, and notice of his fundraiser. So that’s great! However, the other paper is another matter. The Pasadena Voice, and it’s editor, is strong publicity for the Incumbents in every issue. They get mentioned all the time, quoted, given columns, photos, and thanks. They were mentioned by name as being in the Pasadena Parade but the Dem candidates were just called "other political candidates”. They get their photo in the paper for events that have nothing to do with them whereas Jeremiah doesn’t, though he was there too. It’s very unfair and there’s nothing that we can do about it. At least there’s a local political blog that calls it like it is and gives Jeremiah fair airplay along with the other guys.
5) What kind of background would a politician embarking on a career like Jeremiah's likely need to possess? A law background?
The law background makes him a great candidate bc he’s used to talking in front of a judge, jury, and spectators, saying unpopular things, harsh things in front of the opposing side, and most importantly, not taking everything personal. What I admire most is how he doesn’t take it personal if someone doesn’t like him bc it’s politics, not personal. I take it personal for him.
The other Democratic candidates are a fire fighter and a lawyer (plus he’s a career politician). The incumbents are also well suited for the job: one is a businessman (and independently wealthy- he lives on Gibson Island, wealthiest place to live in the state, and owns part of the gym chain Big Vanilla), one works for his dad’s business (so has all the flex time in the world), and one is recently unemployed (so campaigning and politicking is his sole source of income and hope of scoring a pension).
I think a lawyer is a crappy job to have for a politician (maybe an ex-lawyer would be ok) bc he’s already so busy and stressed and then he has to have this stressful, time consuming second job on top of it! But it’s a common one bc of the similar skill sets and the closeness to the law and the closeness to people with money to bankroll a campaign! I think the best would be having a low stress, flexible job, like working for your dad.
Plus, out of the five, here’s the family situations: other Dem Candidates: 1) engaged, has part-time custody of a child 2) married with no kids. Incumbents: 1) divorced, no kids 2) married with 2 middle school aged kids 3) married, no kids. I’m not trying to be hard on their families, but I’m just saying- who do you think has the busiest home life?
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